Have you ever been in a situation where you gave up on something that was beneficial to you and you could not exactly tell why you gave up? My favorite executive coach Linda Brown had me on her empowerment program until I dropped. When she asked me recently “What are the benefits of you giving up?” I felt really challenged. There was no benefit to giving up for me because. I experienced positive changes in me when I was fully engaged with the program.
However, her question also prompted me to reflect a bit deeper on the question: Why is giving up so easy? And I clarify that in this case I am talking about giving up on doing something that actually is helpful, adds value to your life. Why is that? There are three top reasons I could identify. Here they are:
- The Call Back From Comfort Zone
This is a major reason. Old habits die hard. Whenever you find yourself moving towards a new goal you set for yourself, your old habits resist and provide reasons for your mind to trick you into giving up.
Programming a new behavior into a habit takes time, sometimes as much time as it took to build the old habit. It takes a strong support system setup outside your comfort zone to keep you away from it. That is why Alcoholics Anonymous members report very positive results more often than not.
- Life Knocks
Life can knock you down sometimes. It comes out of nowhere and throws punches at you that you could not anticipate. Three days ago I wrote a complete article I was very proud of. More than 500 words that I had completed in less than 15 minutes. I was narrating an experience I had had during the day and drawing lessons from it.
When I was done and clicked on “Preview” in my browser, the article disappeared. Incidentally my Internet connection had been disconnected and I had not realized. I felt so discouraged that I spend the next two days not writing anything. I remained stuck on that emotion towards the writing process. I am now back and writing, and I am planning on writing to make up for the days I did not write.
- Weak Reasons
I love the saying “When the dream is big enough, the odds don’t matter.” That is true. However, if your reasons for going after what you want are weak, the dreams don’t matter. If you don’t have enough good reasons not to give up, you will easily give up when the opportunity presents itself. What is good about giving up because you have weak reasons is that once you have stronger and better reasons, it puts you back in the game with renewed strength and zeal.
Have you ever given up on something good for you in the past? Why?
Day 6 of 200 words per day for 10 days.