Yesterday I was having a discussion with my lovely sister and I remember a saying by Winston Churchill: Never ever ever give up. During that discussion, I brought up the fact that sometime in order to succeed in keeping a commitment or making something happen, the best option is to let go. To let go means to detach yourself from your expectations of what the outcome of a situation should be and just enjoy the present moment, as it is.
The problem with letting go is that when we become so obsessed about something or even someone, it become very difficult to detach ourselves. Here are three basic reasons why people don’t let go:
1. They think letting go is equal to giving up. You cannot accept a gift with your hands closed. For big size gifts you will sometimes need to empty both of your hands. You are not simply letting go of what you have to be able to receive what you deserve.
2. They are perfectionist. Darren Lacroix (2001 World Champion of Public Speaking) loves saying “done is better than perfect.” That says it all.
3. They misinterpret failure. Failure is an opportunity to try again and do better the subsequent times. Accept failure as a possible outcome, and make it OK to have to start over, as many times as necessary.
Is it not easy to let go. But here is the good news: nothing is easy. Almost everything worth doing and worth doing well will not be “easy.” If you are going through an experience which is proving to be more challenging than you anticipated, or you are hitting a wall in one area of your life, I invite you to take a few steps back to get a fresh perspective. Should you be letting go?
Day 8 of 21: 100 words per day for 21 days. 278 words.
You will always be judged by people you come in contact with based on how you look, what you say and how you say it. In many cultures a handshake is the first human physical contact that you will have with strangers, or people you know and are not familiar with. A good first impression can be a deal maker and the opposite can be a deal breaker.
In alignment with improving the first impression you give people, I want to share with you five keys to a very good handshake. I was first exposed to this information when Cindy Carpenter shared it as components of the General Motors Handshake Formula.
Here are the five keys:
- Eye contact: Eyes are the window to the soul. When you look at someone in the eyes during your handshake, it gives you the opportunity to create a deeper connection instantly. The stronger the initial connection, the more influence you can subsequently have on the individual.
- Verbal greeting: Acknowledge the person you are greeting with by mentioning his or her name. Someone’s name is the most precious sound they can hear. When you add a pleasant verbal greeting to your handshake, you make an even better impression.
- Completeness of grip: Go all in with your handshake, that’s how you communicate power, strength and confidence. If your hand is too big or too small compared to average, don’t be intimated. The people you shake hand with will feel your energy.
- Temperature: I have shaken hand with many people and I am sure just like myself you have experienced people whose hands were sweaty, too warm or too cold. The ideal temperature for a memorable handshake is the body temperature. Keep your hands at body temperatures in anticipations of handshakes. Remember it contributes to a great first impression.
- Strength: Again, you want to communicate confidence and power to the person you are shaking hand with. The secret with strength is to measure it in proportion to the size and the demeanor of the person you are are greeting. When in doubt, give a firm rather than flimsy handshake.
There are other elements that go into developing a good handshake. Here is a link to an additional resource on the subject: http://goo.gl/7ZWv2V
Who have you had a most memorable handshake with? What made it memorable?
Day 7 of 21: 100 words per day for 21 days. 393 words.
I once heard world renowned motivational speaker Les Brown say that most people experienced their first heart attack on Monday morning. That is because most people are not happy with their jobs. While there are thousands complaining of joblessness, those with the jobs (and sometimes high paying jobs) are complaining about not being “fulfilled.”
If you are not “happy” with your current job, change it. If you don’t think you can change it, quit complaining and start increasing your productivity. All the energy that you spend complaining about being unhappy can power a city with a few thousand people for days, even weeks depending on how bad your “I hate my job” case is.
On a more serious note, read the book “Life is Tremendous” by Charlie Tremendous Jones.” I promise you if you read that book with an open mind and an open heart, your whole attitude towards your job will change. You can place the order for the book on this page: http://goo.gl/klV4GJ. I read the book in two sittings and it had been a while that I had read any book in less than five sittings. Get that book!
As you wait for the book to be delivered to your mailbox, answer the question: Why was I hired in this organization? Maybe you don’t like your job anymore because the problem you were hired to solve has been solved and you have not had anything challenging to keep you excited about working there. Discuss with your supervisor or your manager how you can modify your daily activities to doing things that are more exciting, more engaging. It is possible for you to get the fire burning again. Answer this question at the start of every work day: Why am I on the payroll? The day you cannot give an answer satisfactory to you and the people you account to, move on!
Why are you on the payroll?
Day 6 of 21: 100 words per day for 21 days. 323 words.
The easiest thing you will ever have to do is… nothing. Doing nothing is easy, when you don’t care. Here is the problem with nothing: doing nothing produces nothing. Who said you have to produce anything anyways? If you want to do nothing and produce nothing, you are welcome to do so. For most people, including myself, doing something takes action, setting oneself into motion. However, if you are an individual who has aspirations and wants to fulfill your dreams, you have to do something.
If you do nothing towards the realization of your goals and dreams, you will produce results. Those results will be… nothing. Nothing changes until something happens. Make something happen by taking one action step today towards one of your goals.
What action will you take today?
Day 5 of 21: 100 words per day for 21 days. 131 words.
Many times in life we refuse to take chances on other people because we know little about them, or not enough to make a “reasonable” and “informed” decision. The tragedy is when we don’t take chances on ourselves because we don’t have a “track record” that shows evidence of our probable ability to succeed in future endeavors. The story below is meant to encourage you to take chances, make big bets on you. I was inspired during a conversation with someone. Read on!
There was once a ranch owner who was involved in horse racing and horse shows. He owned half a dozen race horses he had bought, cared for and loved very much because they were all regular winners. They all participated in racing competitions at the local horse track. They all were greatly admired by all the other ranch owners in the region.
The ranch owner’s favorite relaxation activity was taking long horse rides in nature and camping out during weekends. One of those nights camping out, he found and captured a young stallion. The stallion had obviously detached from his herd and was lost. The ranch owner took the stallion home and because of his unique nature, he started making a new fortune breeding the stallion with female horses from other ranch owners.
One Monday night there was a tragedy. The stalls took fire and all burned to the ground with all the horses. All the horses’ carcasses were found, except the stallion’s. The ranch owner was devastated. He stayed up for two days reflecting on how he was going to get back on his feet after such a tragedy. The second day after the tragedy, the stallion showed up in the front yard of the rancher. He was really excited because that was the only horse he had left. There was an upcoming race that weekend and even though the horse had never been in a race, the rancher decided to bet everything he had left on the stallion. Our rancher’s stallion won the race and earned him a small fortune that enabled him to start rebuilding his business with confidence.
Had you been in the stands and not knowing the story of the rancher, would you have bet on the stallion whose first race it was?
Day 5 of 21: 100 words per day for 21 days. 384 words.